Story :3

Today, I'm going to tell you the story of my music making journey, yippee kay-yay. :D
(ignore the fact that I already posted this exact same thing thrice on three different pages before)



TW: Mental Health, suicide.




Around 2010-2012, when I was 9 years old or so, I installed an ultra mega basic app to DJ on my tiny little smartphone, I got this urge to try it myself after watching mashups on YouTube. A week or so later, I upgraded to Virtual DJ 7 on my PC. I learned how to record it and made a LOOOT of mashups, which I would upload to Soundcloud as Redacted.

A year or so later, I got Ableton... but I didn't get it at all. No tutorial helped my smooth teenage brain to understand such DAW, so I gave up like after a month.

A few months have passed now and I just discovered FL Studio! It was way easier to understand and the tutorial out there were also easy to follow. One of the first things I tried was making a remix of a random remix contest I found online, and... it went exactly as you would expect. I gave up right after.

Now it's 2019, and I made a remix out of the blue. I realized I could make Lofi Hip-Hop, that genre I discovered about weeks ago. So I attempted making a remix of 'Ghosting' by Mother Mother. At the end of it, I was happy with the result and uploaded to both Soundcloud and YouTube, and got views.

From October 2019 I "worked" on stuff, tapping on a lot of genres, but not a single track saw the light of day. That was until 2021, I remixed Mother Mother twice, a Happy Hardcore remix and a Lofi Hip-Hop '0 (F O E V E R)' by arai tasuku inspired remix. Both went under the radar, like a million kilometers under the radar.

But 2022 was different, or at least the very end of it. On November, I started a little something, a Vocaloid Dubstep-Hardcore(?) as a gift for the second anniversary to the beautiful relationship I have with cabrito. I started off with the lyrics while listening to 'metal' by food house on the way home. When I arrived, I didn't lose time and got straight into experimenting on Vocaloid. And after a few days of "hard work", I got a demo, which my girlfriend allegedly liked. He told me to upload it to streaming platforms and I accepted, but with one single condition: She had to make the artwork.

Now that this was supposed to go live EVERYWHERE, I had to come up with a name. I didn't think twice and went, "naophobic seems right".
A bit edgy? Yeah. Does it work? Nah, but I'm lazy enough to not change it. Also I sort of found reasons for the name, like: 1, haha, I hate myself, I feel phobia towards myself; and 2, it sounds similar to neophobia, which is something I was interested at the time... I don't know.

And finally in April 2023, without proper announcement, 'DOA' alongside with 'tHeYrE dYiNg' were released.



...


Meanwhile naophobic was happening (or better yet, my EDM artist journey), another music facet was co-existing with it all along.

Back in 2019, when I was going under another Redacted pseudonym, and not only made that Lofi remix of 'Ghosting', but I also released acoustic music, all with only a guitar, in one take.

But not everything can be fine and dandy. A month later of my latest acoustic release, my mental health went went downhill. For context, since 2017 I've had a history of diagnoses and, every other month, I would have a suicidal episode where I would think of it, contemplate it and sometimes even plan it. And in July 2019 I had one of those months and, in a third attempt to leave earth, I deleted most of my social media accounts, therefore wiping my music off the Internet. Every single song now lost media (as I'm not aware if any of my followers downloaded any of my songs).

But anyways! I survived! And on October of the same year I met (or rather I got in contact again) with who is now the love of my life! I was happier than ever, so happy I got motivation and inspiration to write and record music again! And now, as your boo, I started uploading the same type of music as before, the only difference being with a uke instead of a guitar. With a brand new YouTube channel I would upload covers and my very own music, creating a much bigger repertoire. Until I didn't because again depression hit me and I deleted this channel. Most of the songs are lost (some recovered by my wife).

And this side of me was hidden until a random Sunday in April 2020. I literally cannot remember this, but that day I recorded some guitar chords and stuff... and that's it. It wasn't until a year later that I found those recordings while going through my files. Got curious and started working on it, turning it into a Shoegaze track. Then I left the project behind until 2023, when I uploaded a demo to my now inactive Twitter. And it's then when the Lofi, Shoegaze, Morute, Slowcore project begun, named xenogirl. The origin of the name is much better than the origin of naophobic. I named it xenogirl because that's my gender identity... cool.



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And that would be the entire story, my origins. I wish you the best tomorrow!